My Rant For the Week

Ya’ll. You guys. My peeps. I am struggling. I hate for this to be a ranting post, but I just need an outlet to vent. I really hate my job. Hate would be an understatement. What makes it worse, is I was happy in my previous job so I’m even more spiteful that I was moved out of it. Forced to move. With no choice whatsoever. Yes it’s a move up. But no, I was not interested in moving up or in that direction. I’m trying to be optimistic, but it’s causing so much stress in my life and is making me worry that this stress is not good for this sweet little life that’s developing inside me. What’s worse, is I can’t do a darn thing about it. Somehow, I ended up being the one that financially provides for my family. Looking back 15 years ago, I never thought I would be in this position. On top of that, I’m pregnant. The job market for someone who is going to pop a baby in a few months really isn’t too hot. So, I feel stuck because I can’t do anything until post baby and if something does change, it has to be something that brings in the same amount of dollas that I’m making now.

The hubby is great. He is trying really hard to find something else. We were told that once you’re in the teaching field, it’s really hard to get out. We’re finding that to totally be the case. He’s qualified in such a variety of fields: you don’t find many people who have a meteorology degree (from being in the Air Force), History graduate degree (he's a nerd), and a future Financial graduate degree (again, a nerd :-P). He’s way smarter than I will ever be. But it’s hard to market yourself and network when you don’t know anyone in those fields. Not to mention the economy is still horrible.

So. That’s where I am today. It completely breaks my heart to have to leave my sweet girl every morning and walk to a “hell hole.” I call it that because one of our outside vendors made the comment that it looked like people were walking to their death going into our building. Wow. That should tell you something! So, we pray and apply for jobs and talk to as many people as we can. But I don’t see an end anytime soon, which makes me even more anxious and stressed. I envy those people who are in a job that they love, whether it be in an office or being able to stay at home with your kids. Hopefully one of these days I will find out what that’s truly like. Until then, say a prayer for us =)